Monday, February 2, 2009

We Now Return You to Your Regularly Scheduled Optimism...

...gosh, I should know better than to blog when I'm sick! That was a little...much, no? I have been scared, and a little depressed, lately, but I've also been trying to focus on hope. We have made it through worse than this before, and we can make it through worse again if we have to. Thank you guys for your support, it means a lot to me to know that you're pulling for me.

There is one thing I'd like to keep from last post, one thing that actually still makes sense and resonates with me. The phrase "I am never broken," is going to be my mantra to get through this big ol' mess. I've thought about it, and I need something simple to remind myself, something to keep gritting my teeth and repeating as needed until I believe it. And, well, it applies. Life has handed me a few troubled times, and it's beaten me down a little. It's never yet broken me, though, and if I have it my way, it never will. I'm actually inspired by the whole song, but well, that takes a little longer to say, you know?

I'm still not feeling quite up to par, but this should be more coherent and less stream-of-consciousness. I've been able to keep food down for the first time in two days, though I'm still reallyreally dehydrated. I just wanted to address that last post, and let you all know that really, I'm mostly okay. I worry and wonder, but I do remind myself that there are still good things in my life, and that there are still people who have more problems and need more help than I do. So, back to focusing on the positive, and reminding myself that we'll be okay. And one more quick quote to round things out, since I'm still into lazy blogging. A real post sometime soon, I promise!

Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune--without the words,
And never stops at all,

And sweetest in the gale is heard;
And sore must be the storm
That could abash the little bird
That kept so many warm.

I've heard it in the chillest land,
And on the strangest sea;
Yet, never, in extremity,
It asked a crumb of me.

--Emily Dickinson

5 comments:

Donna Lee said...

As long as there is proto pizza, life will go on.....I know that maintaining a positive attitude is tough (remember the 'dark years'?) but you come from sturdy stock. Remember that you are my Wood Woman and as such you can do anything. Especially with that stubborn Kifferly blood in there. I have faith that things will be ok. I have to or I'd never get out of bed in the morning.

Bells said...

Oh Emily D. I love her. Beautiful choice. hang in there, Em. I am never broken and neither are you although I've sure felt more than a little crushed at times.

Rose Red said...

I think it is a great mantra.

Galad said...

Glad to hear your outlook and stomach are both better today. Of always been fond of the Scarlett O'Hara approach "I'll think about that tomorrow".

Continuing to send positive thoughts your way.

Monique said...

Thanks for the follow up post. I think we were all a bit worried about you Em. I love Emily Dickinson and studied her at school. You keep slipping her into your posts and reminding me that she exists and that I ought to revisit her.